Become an Hero

by Nidol Slazar

---

When your life is spiraling downwards,
after you've fallen through the crack,
At the bottom there is nothing,
and there's no way of getting back,

When things begin to lose their meaning,
As your personality goes astray,
People hate you more and more,
As you live through another day,

When the feelings pick apart your soul,
I'm sorry to say there is no chemo,
Perhaps you should stop kidding yourself,
And admit that you are an emo,

When they say you are a worthless ass,
Their opinion is indeed a fact,
Stop shrugging it off as poppycock,
And cease your foolish act,

When the caring stops immediately,
And your morals turn to smoke,
The cruelty embeds itself within,
To laugh at another sick joke,

Once you've become what you hate,
You're only one step above,
To offending what is left,
And destroying everything you love,

Now death seems like another chance,
As you feel like an absolute zero,
There is only one thing left to do,
And that is to become an hero.

---

copyright (c) 2008 - Nidol Slazar - used by the gracious permission of the author.

Comments

[Tizzers Foxchase]

lmao. *claps*

Also, you're doing it wrong. <3

[anon]

it's "become an hero" you idort

unless this was all one huge troll to try to bait the /b/tards

[Nidol Slazar]

an hero*
D:

[Nidol Slazar]

Pixeleen that wasn't a grammatical error >_______>

[Anonymoose]

lulz

[Sigmund Leominster]

Baiting grammar pedants is unfair, and using "an hero" is waving the proverbial red flag at a bull. Of course, poets are allowed to play with words however they wish and if "an hero" performs an honorable function, then so be it.

Without doubt, a Herald article is as prone to slips as any other, especially if it is based on actual transcripts from on-line conversations, where function dominates form and "slips of the finger" can turn English into Typonese faster than you can say "an honest mistake."

The "rule" for the "a/an" distinction (and I use the word "rule" guardedly least someone anoint me with the label of "prescriptivist") is that you use the "an" before any "h-word" where the aitch is NOT sounded. With "hero," the aitch is indeed sounded - try saying "my hero" and unless you are a London cockney, you'll hear an aitch. So Grammar Man would swear blind that "an hero" is a non-standard use, and the cockney would "be 'appy to 'ave an 'ero" in a sentence.

But poets and writers, being the sensitive and aware folks that they are, sometimes feel the need to diddle with rules and toss out non-standard forms just for effect. Tragically, being a complete poetry schlub, I'm not qualified to make any judgment on whether this specific use of "an hero" is poetic or not. I just wanted to waste a few minutes of my breakfast time raising awareness about the plight of the aitch in current spoken and written English.

Next week I'll be posting on the Death of the Subjunctive, the Loss of the Gerund, and the Curious Case of the Dangling Participle. And who says the English language is boring ;)

[Ava Cartier]

I don't get it.

[Vegna, orly?]

you're doing it wrong :)

[Kalel Venkman]

Why don't furries follow this? They must be very depressed with all their failure displacement and bawwwing.

[Ava Cartier]

Marry me, Sigmund.

[anon]

Sigmund Leominster: PSSSST. YOU'RE AN IDIOT.

[Vegna]

do i have to be the one to explain this:

AN HERO: fucking meme: YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG (if you dont get that well - become an hero)
an hero is a meme for someone who has committed suicide originally discovered by /b/tards after a kid killed himself and a friend posted on his myspace "he was an hero" instead of posting "he was a hero" thus it gained fame and has clocked up many lulz since. notable an-heroes include Adolf Hitler, V-TECH dude (v-tech just kicked in yo).

in b4 confused furfags

Now after sounding like a twat for explaining Im going to ^^

[Sigmund Leominster]

Well, thanks for the explanation of the use of "an hero" as a "fucking meme," Vegna. Great use of the "-ing" participle as an attributive adjective. Gotta love that.

Interesting that you also cite Adolf Hitler a "notable an-hero(es)" with "an-hero" being used as a compound noun rather than a noun ("hero") preceded by the indefinite article ("an"). This clearly implies that we can now talk about "an an-hero" and that the meme has changed from a phrase to a noun. Wonderful! Kudos for alerting me to that, Venga.

Everything I said about the standard use of "an" with "h-words" still stands, of course, but now that I understand the derivation of the non-standard form, life can go on as normal. Lexicographers, poets, and linguistic pedants can now rest easy in their comfortable SL sex beds.

And thanks to "anon" for calling me "an idiot," which is much better than "a idiot" and using the incorrect form of the indefinite. I believe "anon" must be a prolific poster because he/she posts SOOO many replies. Those of us who actually stick a moniker on our posts look like slackers.

And Ava, just set the date and we'll tie the knot. I'll check with my GF to see if she's OK with it first - wouldn't want to spend all that money on a grand ceremony only to have my avatar torn limb from limb at the altar.

Who says the Herald is a worthless tabloid full of scandal, gossip, trivia, and sex? You can actually learn stuff here ;)

[Mony Markova]

Like opening the doors of the secret City of Shangri La and saying "Did u see the mud under the door?"

Just a note - Sigmund is already taken.

The original note by Nidol, is full of pain and desesperation, but explodes into an idea that iw as whort while as human dreams and what makes us great.

Can we all be heroes in SL?

[Kaitlyn]

Sigmund, I'd marry you if you were not such a pompous prick.

Call me heartless if you will, but personnaly I think the idea of an an hero hilarious.