CNN’s SL iReport Hub Vanishes!!!

Experts blame alien abductions for site’s destruction

by Pixeleen Mistral, National Affairs desk

Metaverse experts dismissed the possibility that Second Life is a hostile environment for mainstream marketing efforts and media outlets, pointing out that alien abduction is the most likely explanation for the disappearance of CNN’s in-world “iReport Hub”.

CNN iReports Hub Nuked!

Almost exactly one year ago, the opening of the in-world I-Report hub was celebrated with promises of journalists - or at least avatars representing journalists - appearing at a special virtual building which included “a news desk where CNN producers will hold weekly editorial discussions, and an amphitheater for larger in-world events, such as training sessions and appearances by CNN anchors and correspondents”.

Today there is no evidence of the building, and the iReport site is indistinguishable from any other abandoned SL property.

Many believe that flying saucers or beings from another galaxy are responsible for the surprising disappearance, and point to a pattern of disappearances including Reuters and The Bild's AvaStar - shocking departures from the metaverse media scene that puzzle some residents. Another factor in the disappearances could be a shortage of aluminum foil hats resulting in excessive exposure to dangerous thought control beams. At press time it was unclear if the CNN leaders were wearing the shiny protective headgear before they vanished.

A few traces of the Hub remain however, and the CNN web site still has a video of the iReports Hub in happier times:

"The thing we most hope to gain by having a CNN presence in Second Life is to learn about virtual worlds and understand what news is most interesting and valuable to their residents" - Susan Grant, executive vice president of CNN News Services, November 2007.

Let us hope that the aliens did not erased Ms. Grant’s memory during her time in the flying saucer - we'd hate to see all that valuable market research go to waste.

Comments

[FlipperPA Peregrine]

Don't cry for me Second Life!
The truth is I never left you
All through my wild days
My mad existence
I kept my promise
Don't keep your distance

And as for fortune, and as for fame
I never invited them in
Though it seemed to the world they were all I desired

[$cif@gs Uni7e]

Lord Xenu did it.

ALL HAIL LORD XENU!!

[Pixeleen Menstral]

On the rag bitch?

[Ranma Tardis]

It was a failure like all real life things into second life.
It had no purpose, none at all!

[Pappy Enoch]

It ain't no alien proctolergists in flyin' teacups, ya'll...IT AM THE RAPSHURE! Whee hoo--Gawd dun kleened out the fake ambulance chasers furst!

Don't meen they ain't a-gittin' PROBED, tho....

[OpenWhat]

The new SL price of $10000 US might be just a cover up
and really is a finders fee for those alien abducted reporters.

[Pixeleen MenstralCycle]

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[Anonymous]

...thus nothing of value was lost.

[LOL]

yet another victem of the Global economy. CNN's parent company "AOL Time Warner" most likely pulled out of SL becuase they got nothing of value for the $$$$$$$$$ they spent on it!

[2 Cents]

As the U.S. and Global economies go - so does the virtual rip-off!
/
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Multi-trillion devaluation of retirement accounts.
Job losses totalling more than 1 million and projected to approach 2 million in the U.S. - just this year alone.
Interest rates = cost of money, tanking worldwide. Even saving doesn't pay anymore.
Personal Savings Rate in the U.S. not just zero but effectively NEGATIVE if you consider the lack of saving coupled with the huge amount of borrowing (money borrowed on second mortgages as one example) and now the evaporation of those previously perceived HIGH home VALUES and the subsequent loans created.
Home values in the U.S. averaging 70% of what they were at the recent peak; some markets experiencing a greater than 50% drop in value since '05 in the more depressed areas.
Price of OIL below $55 just today and projected to hit as low as $30 to $40/barrel.
The cost of war = 10+ Billion per month to the United States.
/
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~ all in all ~
/
/
The perception of WHAT is VALUABLE is dramatically changing worldwide.

You'd best rethink your strategy of where to put your money!

You'd best re-evaluate what constitutes VALUE in entertainment!

You'd best get back to basics and ditch the virtual bullshit!

You'd best GET REAL!
/
/
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Linden Research will fail in 2009 - bank on it...

[anonymous]

@2 Cents - Bravo! You know IBM will take SL over, open source the whole thing, and probly manage the grid itself hell of a lot better! That is of course if by then any of us will even be able to afford to keep our computers, forget the dsl / cable lines to connect. :P

[Marc Woebegone]

So funny, how only the lawyers survive.